People Don’t Change

Updated: Nov 23, 2021

“People don’t change,” was the mantra of Dr. Gregory House, the main character of the hit CBS drama, House. When I heard him say it (my wife and I recently started watching it on Amazon Prime), I instinctively said, “No! People can change. I have!!” Or, have I?

When I thought about it more, I was surprised to discover that I did agree with Dr. House. People don’t change. Rather, we can grow into our best selves.

You might say this is just a game of semantics. What is the difference between saying people can or cannot change, evolve, transform, or grow? How you define the possibility of “change” can be the difference between you succeeding in upgrading your life or remaining stuck in patterns that do not serve you or those around you.

Change is hard. Most of us tend to do the same things over and over again because they are familiar and comfortable. This also applies to patterns or behaviors that are harmful. It might feel safer to stay in a destructive pattern rather than risk the unknown and the discomfort that comes when trying something new that can ultimately lead to improvement.

Rather than put pressure on yourself by believing you need to change, you can take that pressure off by understanding that in essence, there is nothing to change. You were born with a blueprint to be your best self. It already lives within you. Here are two essential questions. First, are you willing to go through a period of discomfort to get there? Second, how can you access that beautiful blueprint to live with more vibrancy, joy, and satisfaction?

If you think about it, there are many systems that support this idea. Astrology creates the blueprint based on the position of the planets when you were born. The Enneagram bases it on personality types. Ayurveda bases the blueprint on your prakruti, the unique combination of energies, called doshas, based on the five elements of space, air, fire, water, and earth.

Your prakruti is determined at birth and does not change over your lifetime. The beauty of it is it can give you an understanding of how you operate in the world. The key to “change” is whether or not you are living in harmony with your unique blueprint.

Once you understand what areas of your life are out of balance, Ayurveda can make recommendations on what needs to change to bring you back into harmony with your doshic blueprint. What needs to change is not you! What needs to change are lifestyle choices that do not serve the you that already lives inside you.

I have found understanding myself according to my prakruti invaluable. Changing my diet based on it, the time of day I eat, and when I go to sleep, are a few examples of what I did to help restore balance. I have lost weight, am in a better mood, and I am more aware in general of what I am choosing to do and why.

Have you changed over the course of your life or is it more accurate to say you have grown? Let me know how you see it and what rings true for you.

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